This one has been sitting quietly in my documents folder for almost two years now. It feels like the right time of year to share it.
The Garden
On March 5
The cold and grey sinks
Deep into my bones
Like a toothache.
I message my mom
(In all caps):
IS IT TIME TO PLANT THE GARDEN YET?????
Planting is
Two months away
at least.
A craving for
Green and for
Growth
Has taken strong root.
The Past
This garden still feels like
It belongs to Grandma.
Rubber boots on,
Kerchief secured under her chin,
Grandma marching
All pleasant and business
Out to the garden.
My mom teaches me
To, just like Grandma,
dunk the roots of
Petunias and pepper plants
In water
Before tucking them into
The eager open earth.
My thumb is not so green as hers was, but
I am determined
To be a grower of
Green and colour and softness and nourishment and life
Like Grandma.
The Present
As we bend
Near the earth,
We find ourselves
Face to face with
Our selves-
Pebbles,
Worms,
Weeds,
A composted peach pit or two,
And all.
In the garden
I am faced with my oldest fear-
The fear of doing things wrong.
A garden is gracious and generous,
But
It cannot lie.
If I plant wrong,
It cannot grow.
It is a
Terrifyingly tangible illustration of the fact that
We reap what we sow.
This year,
There are some
Gaps in my rows,
Even though
I planted so carefully.
Perhaps
I was
Too
Careful?
For a moment,
I want to never plant again.
But Garden-Mom says
Nonsense
and the garden performs
a slow magic and
spills and vines
until the gaps lose their baldness.
Next spring will find me
On my knees again
In this warm, freshly tilled soil.
The Future
The truth is that
We are a hungry people.
Always have been,
Always will be.
I feel my emptiness deeply
In the midst of
Pandemics and
Wars and
Inflation and
Climate change.
We plant
Out of hunger, but also
Out of hope.
Year after year,
Future always uncertain,
We sprinkle seeds into the kind earth
And cover them with soil and prayers.
We are expecting
Corn
Lettuce
Beans!
But mostly?
We are hoping for
Love
Peace
Connection
Joy!
We are hoping for
Abundance and
For Enough.
The plunk of
Endless green beans against stainless steel bowls
And
The silent stretch of
Zucchini growing right before your eyes
Drip with all the delicious grace
That the future holds.
On that day-
March 5-
When I message my mom
(In all caps):
IS IT TIME TO PLANT THE GARDEN?????
She responds with a satisfying amount of
Flower and sunshine emojis
And tells me about a
Specific flower
She hopes to plant this year.
They’re called
Ranunculus.
And you? What are you planting this year? :)